The Hubster and I haven't been connecting as much lately. It's not that we're arguing a lot or anything... we just both are very busy and have lots on our minds. On evenings we are both home, by the time we get the kids to bed, we often go our own separate ways again. We are lucky if we get out by ourselves. We average once every few months. And the last several weekends have been very busy so we have not had much time together, nor have I had much time without the kids. The weekends are usually my chance to regroup, rest, and prepare for the week ahead.
This afternoon Andrew had a very difficult time napping. This is something that was often an issue with Emma but hasn't been as much with him. Well, after a long, busy weekend, his routine was all messed up and he was needing major sleep. And sometimes the more sleep a baby needs, the harder it is for the baby to settle. After each of us worked with him off and on for an hour, I found myself very frustrated. I could feel my blood pressure rising. For one, I really wanted him to get the sleep he needed. And also, I admit, I just wanted "my time" to relax and get some things done while both kids slept. I felt myself melting.
That's where my wonderful Hubster comes into play. He patiently listened to me melt and offered to take the baby somewhere in the house where I could not hear him. Shortly after that, Emma awoke and he offered to take them on a drive so I could have some time to myself and the baby could maybe sleep some more.
They were gone for 1 1/2 hours. What a gift. I watched the rest of a Dr. Phil, took a short nap, made oatmeal bread and carrot soup for dinner. Andrew only slept for 10 minutes on the drive, but I had the break I needed to feel refreshed for another week. And Pete recognized a need and acted on it. I felt truly heard and loved.
Some of you are familiar with the Love Languages (Gary Chapman has a book which I recommend.) My languages are quality time and acts of service. What Pete did today was such an act of service to me.
About Me
- Kris
- I am a wife, a mother, a daughter, a sister, and a friend. But first I'm a woman and I'm committed to taking care of myself so that I can have good relationships with others. This is not always easy. Okay, some days it's just plain impossible but I'm working at it! For almost 3 1/2 years I have been home raising children. Though quite difficult at first, I feel very content with my lifestyle choice. I am grateful that I have this "choice" and that it was mine to make. In college, I spent three months living in Costa Rica, Central America, for a Study Service Term. While there, I became familiar with the term Pura Vida. My interpretation of the phrase is "life is good." Sure, I have complaints and I am full of flaws. Many times things don't go my way. But hey, who has the perfect life (and wouldn't that be boring)?! My life is good!!
6 comments:
I live for nap time and bedtime-I think it became really important to me when Josh was living in New Orleans while I was a single mom here. So I know the exact frustration you experienced. But isn't it great when your husband can see that you are about to lose it and step in for you. It makes all the difference in the world to have someone to hold you up... believe me!
I love the name The Hubster. That is cracking me up! Kudos to him to see what you needed, which is a deserved break, and then giving it to you. What a great Sunday afternoon treat!
I do feel grateful. And MCM, I also feel a little guilty with my story because you were like super single mom for months and months while you were essentially homeless and husbandless with two small children. I still don't know how you pulled it off and still stayed so positive!! (For those of you who don't know MCM, her family was victim of Hurricane Katrina.)
Don't feel guilty. Now I feel guilty that I made you feel guilty. No really, we all have those feelings of needing our own time to recharge, reset, or just blog away our frustrations. I'm thankful that all of you bloggers do blog and express yourselves in such creative and energetic ways. Just remember, it's not only theraputic for you but also for everyone else who participates.
Okay neither of us should feel guilty about anything!! We Mennos do that too much anyway. :) When are you starting your blog, MCM?
Kris, your entry brought tears to my eyes. Seriously-- romance and love take on a whole new meaning once there's kids in the picture and a household to manage! Hats off to Pete for picking up on your needs and acting on them.
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