Treating the Inner Grump

I've been kind of grumpy lately... at least with Pete. Unfortunately he's usually the one that suffers. I can't even really say why I've been feeling this way, other than I just do every few weeks. Being stuck inside doesn't help. Plus I often struggle with my own inner demons - lacking confidence, loneliness, anxiety, the list could go on. So any little thing that makes me smile or gets me out of this "grump slump" is helpful.

Yesterday I bundled the two kids up at 5:00 pm and we headed outside for 1/2 hour. What a blast!! I finally got Andrew's boots to fit him right so he could actually walk around the shoveled areas. Emma had so much fun jumping around and laying in the snow. I got out our new sled and tied a rope to the front. It was a sorry attempt to pull the kids around in the snow. They kept falling off but it made all of us laugh. The snow is so deep right now (I'm horrible with estimations and haven't heard how much.) At least a foot, right? Anyway, I actually felt invigorated when we went inside.

Within an hour I was grumpy again. So after dinner Pete and Emma initiated a new favorite family game of the kids. Emma and I lay on the couch while Pete ("Big Daddy Monster") and Andrew ("Baby Monster Jr.") get under a blanket and roar at us. The girls scream and giggle. It's hard to be afraid of Baby Monster Jr. when he's just so cute "roaring" at us with a big smile on his face. The kids eat this up.

Then we tried a new version of "Dance Party USA." Perhaps I've spoken of these before - several times a week we turn on music and dance around. Pete is not always home from work but this time we included him. I put on our "Baby Boogie" CD, turned off all the lights, and drew the front curtain. Then we took turns dancing in front of the curtain while someone else wiggled the flashlight back and forth on us. (It's supposed to be like a stroeb light.) Again, the kids thought it was so fun. Andrew loves to "dance" by turning circles.

So our family may be a little quirky but it was fun and at least it treated my inner grump for the evening. :)

Happy Birthday, Ma!

It's my mom's birthday today. I just want to say what a wonderful mom (and grandma) she is and how lucky I feel to have her in my life. I value her compassion, her gift of hospitality and making others feel loved and important, her dedication to her teaching career for so many years, and her thirst to continue to learn and grow as a person. Wish I could've been there to celebrate with you, Mom!! I love you.

Missing Cole

I must admit... I'm really missing our dog right now. I just completed the page in Emma's scrapbook with pictures of us saying goodbye last March. And now I'm teary-eyed. He turned 5 just the other day so I sent some bones to work for Pete's coworker to give to him.

I know we made the best decision at the time for him and for our family. He needed more attention and more exercise. We needed to focus more on our children, and I was projecting too much stress from Cole onto other areas and people in my life. We haven't regretted the decision, and we know his new family adores him. But I still miss him. I loved the way he snuggled with us. I love how the snow fell and looked against his dark black coat. I loved how he made the kids giggle. I always felt protected and safe when he was home with me. It was hard to be lonely with that big lug laying beside me.

I'll recount for you all one of my favorite memories of Cole (it wasn't at the time, but now it makes me smile.) It was almost a year ago that I turned 30. My only request was a chocolate banana cake from a bakery in South Bend. I had tried it several months prior and found it delightful. Pete ordered a pretty big cake so after we shared some with friends one Friday evening, we planned to freeze the rest the next day... after we each had another piece. Well, our dear dog beat us to the punch. In the middle of the night, he managed to stand on his hind legs at the counter, open the cake box with his nose, and ever so carefully and quietly, eat most of the remainder of my birthday cake. Pete almost didn't even realize it in the morning. The cake box was just tipped up a bit and there was not a crumb in sight. I guess I don't have to worry about "sharing" my cake with Cole this year!! (If you haven't already heard the second memory, ask me in person. It's much more fun to tell that way. :))

Blue Like Jazz

Some of you have been hearing me talk about this book for a couple of weeks now. It's written by a guy named Don Miller and was recommended to me by a friend about two years ago. Well, I received it for Christmas and just finished it a few days ago. What an amazing book!!

He writes about his experience with spirtuality, his relationship with Jesus, how he struggles with certain ideas of Christianity, and how we might work to love ourselves and others as Jesus loves us. I found it to be challenging and inspiring and refreshing. He's so honest and real... reminds me a lot of Anne Lamott in this way.

Anyway, I highly recommend this book regardless of where you are or are not on your faith journey. And I'd love to hear what you think when you read it!!

Attached At The Ear

This is Andrew's stuffed elephant... "Smellephant," as we affectionately call it in our house. He received it as a gift from Nana and Grandpa G. when he was born and attached to it after the first few months. He has pure love for it as you can tell by these pictures. Recently I've worked hard at keeping elephant in the crib as much as possible so he associates him with sleeping. He falls asleep by sucking the ear. Yes, it sounds gross, but is not so different than babies who suck a pacifier, bottle, or breast to sleep.

Smellephant gets a bath 1-2 times a week. The other day Andrew watched me throw him into the washer and then transfer from washer to dryer. This really upset him. But it must be done. As you can see, it's yellowing and it begins to smell after a couple of days without being washed.

I'd really like to find a backup elephant. Both my sister and I have searched the internet. She wrote the manufacturer who did not write back. I've had an EBAY search going for several months with no luck. It's the Kid Preferred brand of the Carters line, sold at Target. I know there are other babies with these out there. Perhaps one is just sitting on a shelf in someone's home and is not being loved with the same intensity as Smellephant. If you ever see one or know of one, I would love your assistance. I would pay money for a spare.

Project Complete

Our bathroom is complete... at least the painting part. It was quite a project this time. Of all the rooms we've painted in our house, this one was probably the most challenging in many ways. The space is so tiny and there were so many details to work around with the sink, cabinet, toilet, tub, etc. After three coats of blue and changing the trim from cream to white, we are very happy. It was hard to get good pictures so you'll have to come over to get the real effect. It's a darker blue, perhaps, that what appears in the picture. I splurged on some adorable towels and shower curtains which is how this whole project started. I haven't done it for any other rooms but I couldn't pass these up!